–
“If you have any questions, just write me.”
You have only this sentence and a few selfies in your profile, and
you think I can conjure up questions out of thin air?
“This is your figurehead and will show up in search results.
(15-200 characters)”
Copy-paste is really the best you can do?
“Feel welcome to challenge me! You choose how.”
You are a power bottom, right?
“Catch me if you can.”
I think I will not, seeing what films you watch.
“It's my life, take it or leave it!”
Daffyd Thomas?
“Warning: devil inside! Hit me if you dare.”
You attend all the parties at the most fashionable mainstream clubs
in town, parties with names such as Get Fucked! or special
parties with an S&M or fetish dress code, but you would piss your
pants if you found yourself alone at a sex club, where things go much
further from words and dress codes.
“I am a guy interested in meeting people without complex and
self-confident, to get some of other countries culture, make friends
and who knows maybe...”
Who knows, maybe, one day, if God permits, if I sit here quietly,
patiently, someone notices me and...
“Hey Jungs, suche nix, finde aber gerne.”
You're looking for nothing but you watch my profile ten times a day.
“Forever alone...”
Forever will be.
“I can resist everything except temptation.”
Funny, you thought. So did the other hundreds that copied this to
their headline.
+
The following anecdotes are probably all stolen from somewhere but
they contain a good dose of irony, intelligence, or life experience
even, which I find captivating.
“Try saying “straight acting" with a dick in your mouth.”
“My body is not a temple. It's an amusement park.”
“Carefully chosen words and big penises are sexy.”
“Why do I need a boyfriend, when I can find yours here?”
“Make love not porn.”
And I love this one:
“Si tu crois que entre nous c'est le plan cul!! t'as frappé à la
mauvaise porte!!! d'allieur je suis a K... !! Peutetre tu es
occultiste et tu veux soutirer mes chances ou meme tu veux distrubuer
ta maladie !! euh pardon vas voir ailleurs! je ne suis pas effiminé
Mais je suis d'une douceur un peux exageré pour mec! je suis trop
tactil, genre calin et j'aime la discretion et la beauté! En tt cas
je ne savais pas qu'il existe des gays homophobe!!”
I
began this compilation in July 2012 with a much bigger vision, but
because it is based on a negative emotion, which has never helped me
in writing, I quickly forgot the plan. I completed the list and
edited it in July 2015.
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